Bootstraps and a pull yourself up by 'em attitude, check
Slow twang, a la Matthew McConaughey in his cute, pre-greasy and weird days, check
Healthy respect for bluebonnets, yellow roses and the ladies, check
Deep and abiding love for Willie and Lyle, Stevie, Robert Earle, Ray Wylie, Lucinda and the like, check
Knowin' how to spin a girl 'round the sawdust with a two step, or the Cotton Eyed Joe, even if said girl is your mama, check.
Knowin' when to Texas Hold 'Em, and when to fold 'em, when you're playing a hand with your Nana and Grumpy, check.
A deep rooted desire to drive a big ol' Caddy with horns on the front grill, check
An equally deep rooted desire to one day drive a mud covered truck with a bumper sticker on it that says "Secede," check
Knowin' and lovin' two of the greatest words in the english language, "Gig 'em," check.
Seems all that's been missing in my little Texans' education is Salsa Appreciation 101.
Up to now, they've turned up their noses… but I'm proud to say that we now have on our hands two bonafide salsa chuggers.
Two of my three little Lone Stars are now devoted fans of the stuff. Whether green or red, they dig it. They hoard the chip basket and salsa bowl at restaurants, and even though they are still quenching the heat with Shirley Temples instead of Shiners, I gotta tell ya, they are doing their mama proud.
I regret having to tell you though that there has been a downside to their recently acquired love of salsa.
They now know why their mama mourns her complete and utter lack of tomato growing prowess.
I can grow some big ol' vines, and sometimes I do, out of sheer dumb hope and because I like the way they smell. But I can't get those vines to produce tomatoes. Can. Not. Do it.
I think it's because we just don't get enough sunlight. I love my oak trees accept in tomato growing season, when I curse them straight to you know where and back.
Now we all know you can't fake a fresh tomato sandwich, but I'm here to tell you that you CAN fake fresh salsa. Take it from a girl (and a herd of boys) who knows salsa. As an added bonus, if you're suffering from a cold, it'll clear ya right up!
Here's how you do it:
1 can whole peeled tomatoes
1-2 jalapenos, seeded
1-2 pieces of garlic
15-20 cilantro leaves (or 1 tsp of the dried variety)
1 tbsp fajita seasoning
1-2 tsp salt and pepper
1 tsp cumin
The juice of one lime