Let’s Get Together

by Stefani on 11-August-2008

I don't know when it happened exactly. I suppose it's been a gradual, almost imperceptible shift. 

There are hints of it in the long and increasingly mature conversations over morning cereal, in the way my men are really expressing empathy and genuine concern for others in their prayers, in the elaborate cooperative games they are creating among themselves. 

I hear it when my oldest says, "we're running late Mama. I'll take in the groceries. You hop in the shower."

Or when my middle son sets the table without being asked, or grates the cheese. He no longer needs me to stand over him and fuss over fingers too close to the grater. He can handle it. 

I'm aware of it when we read together. "You read this chapter, and then I'll read the next." 

I feel this shift too, in the recent arrival of collaborative family projects. There's paint by numbers pieces that lay on our craft table. Each of us stopping now and again throughout the day to add to them.  Sometimes too, I hear, "hey! I just fit a new piece into the puzzle!" (the one that takes up our dining room table). Later, we are huddled together over a new endeavor for us, woodburning (a gift for a loved one), and I hear, "You do the curves Mama. I'll do the straight lines." 

It is most apparent when we play music together. They are simple songs, but it has been months in the making… the moment when we can add our little parts and, together, make our song fuller, richer. 

Let's Get Together

Truth be told, it is years in the making – this time when we move from simply nurturing, loving, care-taking of little ones to a new phase, one in which we truly share in life with our young men. We cooperate, converse, work as a team, add our notes together to create real harmony. 

Sweet sweet music. 
Corynne Escalante August 11, 2008 at 9:42 pm

that’s so cool. sometimes it feels like those days will never come! but i also have a horrible feeling that they will come and be gone much to quickly… happy monday!

Linn August 11, 2008 at 10:50 pm

What a lovely entry this is…it not only makes me look forward to the future, but reminds me to be thankful for these days with my little guys.

Kristy August 12, 2008 at 1:38 am

I agree and love how my girls do things for me or with me now instead of just me for them.But don’t you find those change of family dynamics just a little scary too?

Amy August 12, 2008 at 4:19 am

I’m looking forward to these days. as funny as 2 yr olds can be . . .

dana August 12, 2008 at 4:31 am

so beautifully written. i’ve felt this way but never been able to express it quite the same.

michele, FL August 12, 2008 at 5:02 am

It’s amazing how fast they grow up, and it’s such a blessing to see the fruits of our labor! You’re growing fine future husbands and dads! What a job you have.

The Mommy August 12, 2008 at 5:24 am

This is a beautiful post, thank you so much. Something wonderful to start my day. Others commented that the time goes by swiftly, but my son is 15 and he’s still like that. Just an amazing help, and a (mostly) unselfish person. I know that he’ll be a good man, and it sounds like your boys will be too. What a blessing.

Julie @ Letter9 August 12, 2008 at 5:46 am

That’s a very sweet post, but I do believe that child’s n*k!d behind that guitar! : )

melmo August 12, 2008 at 5:52 am

Thank you. With a 1, 2, and 3 year old, it’s nice to see a glimpse, God willing, of what is to come. To help me to enjoy the ins and outs of now, and to go slow, remembering there is a time for everything.

emily August 12, 2008 at 5:53 am

oh how i love this.

Mandy August 12, 2008 at 5:55 am

The sweetest music there is…..

And to Melmo above – i once had a 1,2 and 3 year old and now they are getting ready to head to 1st, 2nd, and 3rd grade! it does get better – oh how it gets better. Just slow down and let them bless you…and they will!

Callie August 12, 2008 at 6:26 am

Oh, I long for these days with my boys! Enjoy!

Tipper August 12, 2008 at 6:48 am

Its so rewarding when you can feel your family working together as one true team unit. Very nice post.

Tammy August 12, 2008 at 7:28 am

What a beautiful post that expresses so many of our feelings. I have wanted to tell you (for a long time I have lurking around your site) how much I appreciate your words. Every post is so beautifully written and always expresses, in words, exactly how I feel about my own little munchkins. Thanks so much.

Sarah August 12, 2008 at 7:56 am

You inspire me to someday be such an observant mom who can let go, but still hold her little ones tight and enjoy what they bring in every moment!

brit August 12, 2008 at 9:12 am

It’s sneaking up on us too, in the way they talk to each other, and check to make sure the other one is okay….beautiful

Cassandra August 12, 2008 at 9:23 am

As always, your insight is a light to my day! Thanks!

Gonzomama August 12, 2008 at 12:05 pm

oh lady, you sure can make me tear up.
you and your boys sure make me look forward to this journey i am on with my wee little one (and the one on the way).
you have a whole house of sweetness over there.

Alexis August 12, 2008 at 1:16 pm

How lovely! I’m looking forward to those days at my house someday…

beki August 12, 2008 at 1:23 pm

I’m feeling the same shift in my own little family. It happens so fast!

melissa s. August 12, 2008 at 2:07 pm

it’s like all the love you put into your babies starts to come right back at you.

Mary Smith August 12, 2008 at 5:08 pm

What a touching post, Stefani, and that’s really what parenting is all about. Raising children to become men and women…

Christina August 12, 2008 at 5:09 pm

That is so great! I like to think (or at least I hope!) that what we’re doing now with our son (and soon to be other little one) will make an impact so we can share wonderful stories like yours about our kiddos!

Hannah August 12, 2008 at 6:40 pm

Wow. How old are your boys? I just long for this kind of interaction with my son, who’s 8, but right now it seems like pie in the sky. I know I can’t compare him to others, but I do hope that SOME DAY I might be able to write a post like yours.
Your labor is not in vain in the Lord …

Relyn August 12, 2008 at 6:45 pm

Sweet, sweet music indeed. Sweet sadness, too. I have loved every new stage of my daughter’s life. And, yet, I mourn the passing of the one before. Maybe all the sweetest music is also sad.

Tiffany August 12, 2008 at 7:44 pm

Wow! Stefani, if you ever have a down day, just look here. You have your own cheering squad! You are very eloquent. Thank you for blessing me daily.

Grace August 14, 2008 at 9:16 am

This is so sweet and lovely. And so good to hear. Lately I have been struggling a little bit — will all this effort that we put into parenting our little ones in a very hands-on, in-touch way really pay off? I know it’s silly to worry, and yet, while I’m very distracted at the moment, I hope that all the investment I’ve made so far (and will continue to make down the road) can carry us through these harder times. As always, you express things so perfectly here.

Jennifer August 16, 2008 at 11:14 am

I have two boys so far; the older one is 2 and the younger is just 3 months. I love them just as they are, and I’m trying my best to eat up the time we are given. You only have babies, then toddlers, for such a short time; they grow up so fast.

All of that said, I have to admit that I’m a little jealous. I taught for 8 years before I had babies to stay home with; I’m more familiar with older kids. I can’t wait for us to be able to create together…

Lisa Clarke August 19, 2008 at 11:21 am

So well put. Makes me want to put down the laptop, figure out where the boys have run off to, and find something fun to do together.

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